Her Humanity
by beautifulending21
Summary: With all the death and destruction surrounding Mystic Falls, Caroline is about to snap. It's up to her best friend to bring her back to herself, without driving her away with his developing feelings. Steroline, Bamon pairings. Rated M just in case of later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

New story my lovelies! These chapters won't be as long or as in depth. Plus, no first person haha! Confusing for me though, trying to write. This chapter will explain everything. Anyways, Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Vampire Diaries or any of it's characters.

* * *

"Care, it's been a few months. You need to get out of the house." He said gently.

"I have everything I want right now, in this house. Blood bags, whiskey, my best friend, and an unlimited amount of sad movies to remind me that there are people who have it worse then me." She said, a slight clip to her tone.

She hadn't been the same since Elena died. It was the straw that broke the camel's back. Tyler had died the same night as they put Klaus down, and then Rebekah ran Matt's truck off Wickery Bridge. It killed Elena, except she had Damon's blood in her system so she came back in transition. Then Alaric died because Elena died, after Esther had linked the two of them, and then Elena refused to complete the transition. Caroline found out after it happened.

"Care, come here." He said opening his arms, as he sat next to her on the couch. Her eyes watered, but she refused to let him see.

"You were there for me at the funeral, when we buried her, and… you held it together so well, for the rest of us. You were our rock Care. Now you need to have your time to mourn and be comforted." Those words broke through and the tears streamed down her face

Caroline shuffled closer to him, to allow him to hold her closer and cried for her best friend. She cried for Elena, for the pain the Originals had brought on this town, and for Tyler. She cried for her favorite history teacher, and how she missed his father-like presence in the group. Klaus had been put down, but Tyler's heart was ripped out in the process. She cried for her own human life, taken from her by Katherine. It was nearly an hour later of rocking and comforting, did her tears dry up and her sobbing stopped.

"You know, I have an idea." She mumbled into his chest.

"Care, is this another 'Distract Stefan from his brooding' idea? Because you are the one in need of a distraction." He said, while rubbing her back.

"No, it's for both of us. I need to start thinking about colleges, and would like to go visit New York as well. And you need to get out of Mystic Falls. I think we all do. Let's take the Originals lead, and blow this Popsicle stand!" She said, already mentally packing what she would need.

"Well, I was going to suggest we take a trip to California, but we can do both. I kind of already bought the plane tickets." He said, pulling them out of his back pocket.

"Stefan!" she said incredulously, though a smile graced her face.

"There! That's what I've missed!" He said, tickling her to keep it on her face.

"You," she giggled batting his hands away, "are incorrigible. Now I have to pack lighter!"

"Why lighter?" he asked.

"Shopping. Duh!"

"I've missed you Care." He said, holding her tighter.

"You've seen me everyday, acting like I'm suicidal and the slightest thing could set me off." She scoffed. The radio played a sweet slow song that had been playing for the past few weeks.

"No, that isn't what I meant. Sure, I've seen you, but I haven't seen a sparkle in your eyes or heard you laugh in weeks. You haven't smiled, you haven't had your usual Caroline temperament and sunny disposition." He said, helping her off the couch. He held out his hand that offered to dance with her.

She didn't know why he was offering, as he hated dancing whenever Elena asked him to. She cautiously took his hand and he twirled her around before pulling her a little closer. She laid her head on his chest and soaked in the comfort he was giving her.

Stefan didn't know why he offered to dance with her, but anything was worth it to see her smile again.

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Let me know what you think!


	2. Chapter 2

Here is chapter two!

I do not own Vampire Diaries or any of it's characters.

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The next day, Stefan announced their plan to leave for a while.

"We both caught up and can finish whatever assignments we get, from here until graduation. We'll be back long before then though." He said to the group. They gathered everyday at the Grill, just to feel a sense of normalcy. Jeremy was quiet, as he and everyone else absorbed this.

"When do you leave?" Bonnie asked. She and Damon were not-so-secretly holding hands under the table. She had smacked sense into him after Elena died and now they were together so much, there was never a moment when they were apart.

"Tomorrow morning." Stefan said. No one at the table didn't feel the empty void of Caroline's missing presence.

Matt was the one to speak up.

"How's she doing?" He asked, not looking up from his beer.

"She's teetering. There are days when she's close to flipping the switch, and others where she can manage to make a conversation without crying. I don't know why I didn't notice and do something about it earlier." Stefan said, berating himself.

"You were the first to notice out of all of us. And you are doing something about it. You being there, being her best friend is doing something." Bonnie said, letting go of Damon's hand under the table and taking ahold of Stefan's on top of the table.

"Blondie needs you if we are gonna help her keep her humanity. Don't forget that she kept you from offing yourself after what happened." Damon said, his voice betraying how grateful he was to Caroline.

"You are the only one she talks to right now. She's ignored all of us, and we've even gone over to see her. She doesn't answer the door, she doesn't even move from her spot on the couch when we bang on the window." Matt said, his eyes distant as thoughts of concern flood his mind.

"There is only so much I can do. And this trip, might be what we both need. I will be sending you updates, but for now. Limited communication with Mystic Falls is what we agreed on. I didn't specify for who though." He said, a small smile breaking through, as thought of how he managed to slip that one by Caroline.

"So, in a week or two, maybe we all can make the trip up to New York? Just for a few days." Bonnie suggested.

"Let's just see where things go. She's not very stable right now. I _just_ got a glimpse of the Old Caroline last night." Stefan said, stressing the last sentence. "Anything could set her off again. I'm just gonna let her shop, relax on the beach, and have a vacation. Take her dancing, sightseeing, you know, distraction stuff. I won't let her have a second to herself, where she could remember and have a break down."

Bonnie had a small smile on her face as she thought about what he said. "Dancing, huh?" She asked. Stefan just rolled his eyes playfully.

"So, anyone else have news?" Damon asked, before he brought Bonnie's hand that was intertwined with his to rest on top of the table. Jeremy gave a small laugh at the subtlety of Damon's declaration. Bonnie looked slightly embarrassed, although a smile graced her face.

"We are simply seeing where things go. We wanted you all to know so no one got the wrong impression." She explained.

"I'm happy for you two." Stefan said, clapping Damon's shoulder.

"Next round is on me," Matt said, tipping his beer toward the two.

"So, who is up for a round of pool?" Jeremy said, with smile for the 'sort of' couple.

"I have to get back to Caroline, but I will drop by tomorrow before we leave. I still have to pack." Stefan said, getting up and placing a few bills on the table for his meal.

"Stefan," Damon said catching up to him.

"I know we haven't talked about her much, or what came between us, but I am sorry for making things harder, for interfering and thinking I loved her. Obviously she didn't love me and I didn't love her otherwise I would have fought harder. You are my brother, and you should know that our relationship means more to me now, knowing I could have lost you. Please thank Caroline for me, and tell her I'm sorry for what I did to her and how I've treated her." He said, before pulling Stefan in for a hug.

"I will. Damon, I forgive you. I did a long time ago. Just don't try and steal another girl from me." He joked. Stefan knew how much Damon meant in his words, and by calling Caroline by her name and not Blondie, showed he was being sincere.

"Don't worry, I've got my own girl to worry about now. Don't want little Gilbert touching her," he joked right back. "Just remember to tell her."

"I won't. It will be the first thing I say to her today when I see her."

* * *

"Stefan! Hurry up, our flight is in two hours and the airport is half an hour away!" Caroline yelled as she sat in her car. They were going to leave it at the airport, and then when they came back from Cali, take Stefan's car up to New York.

"Just a second!" he yelled back.

"Keep her safe," Bonnie said, giving Stefan a quick hug before Damon came down the stairs. He nodded, before turning to his brother.

"We need her back Stefan. She's like the glue that keeps this little band of misfits together." He said, before grabbing his little brother into a hug.

"I promise." He said before ghosting out to the car with his things. Caroline didn't smile, but waved to Bonnie and Damon who stood at the door waving to her.

"I miss you," Bonnie whispered, knowing that Caroline could hear her.

"Hey," Stefan said, getting her attention. She nodded to Bonnie who was glued to Damon's side, before turning to Stefan.

"Road trip music?" He said, pulling out a mix he made the night before.

"As long as it's not sappy love songs, or I will be throwing you out of the car and you can run to the airport." She said, only half meaning it.

"Alright, alright! I promise, no sappy love songs." He laughed, while she started the car.

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What do you think? :) Thank you for reading!


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do not own Vampire Diaries or any of its characters.

* * *

"Stefan! Could you hold this while I, you know!?" Caroline asked, dropping the bags at his feet and dashing off to the nearest restroom. It was that third mimosa that did it, he laughed in his head. They weren't even in California a week and Caroline decided she never wanted to leave.

She was opening up more, and he was as well. She didn't get shy when they had to share a bed in the hotel, and even when Stefan rented a seaside villa for the rest of their stay, she still curled up against his chest every night. He could admit, that it had been awhile since he had someone in his bed, and he could admit that despite trying to get her back to normal, Stefan was attracted to Caroline.

The Elena blinders were off, and despite every model they passed in LA, Caroline captured his attention every time. He could see that her blonde hair, blue eyes and killer body would attract any red-blooded American male. Stefan noticed those, but it wasn't what drew him in. Her spark for life, and freedom, the way she said his name, her cute little noises when she ate ice cream, or her sleep talking that he would stay up just to listen to.

It had been three weeks since they left Mystic Falls.

Caroline was much better than before, but he was worried about bringing up Mystic Falls anytime soon. So, he just pampered her like any best friend would, took her clubbing, and even two stepping. He texted everyone to let them know her progress, and Bonnie kept asking if she could call. I reminded her that when we went to New York, they could come visit.

Caroline washed her hands and checked herself in the bathroom mirror. She wouldn't have noticed how she looked five weeks ago, but now she was seeing how much better she looked. Her eyes weren't as hollow and the bags were gone. Her hair was much more full of luster than it had been, and her smile was making daily, if not hourly appearances.

She had noticed how her crush on Stefan rekindled overnight. One night he was telling her how beautiful she looked, when she knew she looked like crap. The sincerity in his eyes is what flipped it back on.

Little did she know, Stefan was crushing on her too.

She didn't want to ruin this perfect vacation where she was supposed to be relaxing and having fun. She knew it was a Caroline's-lost-it detox, but she appreciated it more than she could express at the moment. She squared her shoulders and marched back out to find Stefan waiting patiently, holding her bags, with a present in his hand.

"Oooo, it that for me?" She asked, her smile reappearing.

"Not so fast, you get it later tonight." He smirked.

"Really, that's like telling me I have to wait for Christmas morning to open my presents." She said, exasperated. Grabbing her bags, and turning to go into the next store, she stomped off.

"Woah, woah, woah. No need to act spoiled. You will see soon enough, and then you will regret being mad at your best friend." Caroline laughed, but she could have sworn she saw a flicker of emotion during those last two words.

"Okay, just a few more stores and then we can head back to the villa." She laughed.

"Get a nice dress, get a pedicure, nice shoes, anything you feel you need, because we are going out to dinner tonight." He said, a smile that was much more than friendly gracing his lips. Caroline's eyes widened a bit, before she flitted off to find the perfect dress.

It was a mid thigh, red dress, that had a one shoulder strap, sequin waist, and flowing layered skirt. She didn't let Stefan see it, because this was her shot, her shot at being happy again. If he didn't feel that spark when they touched, or the rush of being together in the same bed, then she was going to leave, and never come back. She had enough grief and misery, and didn't want to stick around to hear, yet again, "You and me, Caroline, it's never going to happen."

She faltered when she thought of that memory. She must be dreaming things up.

Stefan noticed the change in Caroline's mood when she came out of the store. She wouldn't really look at him, and her smile had disappeared again. She still got a pair of black stilettos, and had a mani-pedi. He tried to joke around with her, and make her laugh, but the smile never reached her eyes.

"This was a good day. I got a personal stylist in you." He said, nudging her slightly.

"Yeah, my best friend needs to look a little more stylish sometimes. There are days when I wonder what decade you're still living in." She laughed, half-heartedly.

"Care," he said, and she willed herself not to melt.

"Something's upsetting you." He said, grabbing her hand and trying to see into her eyes.

"Nope, nothing." She replied with that clipped tone she used when she avoided his interrogations.

"If it's nothing, then you can talk to Bonnie about it. I know it's something though, and if you won't tell me, then at least, tell Bonnie. If there is anything to make you feel better, then tell me. I want to help; I want to make you feel better about moving on, and living, having a life. I'm trying, but you won't let me. Let me in Care." He said, his voice thick with emotion.

"Did you forget?" She asked, her voice void of emotion, "The night at the Falls."

"Care, we've been there plenty of times in the past few years. Would you care to elaborate?" He asked.

"Stop trying to make me feel Stefan. You're the one who tore my heart out. I'm not going to be played again." She turned and rushed off down back alleys until she was back at the villa. No one spotted her, and even if they felt the wind, it was already a windy day. She went to her room that she only used for the en suite bathroom and to change, and locked the door.

Her cell phone lay on her pillow, a text on it.

_Bonnie is going crazy. Please call._

_-D_

Not stopping to have any second thoughts, she dialed the number.

"Caroline?" Bonnie asked hopefully.

"Hi Bon Bon." She replied in a small voice. Bonne sobbed quietly on the other end for a minute.

"How's Cali?"

"Well it was great until about an hour ago."

"What happened?" She asked, confused.

"Stefan's been playing me this whole time. He's been making me think that he cares about me."

"Stefan's your friend, of course he cares about you Care!" She laughed a bit into the phone.

"I'm talking about, more than cares, cares Bonnie." She huffed. "Do you remember what I told you he said to me, that night at the Falls? The one where he directly told me I had _no_ chance with him?"

"He said that because all he could see was Elena. Care, you like him. And it's just you being scared. You're back!" She said, almost happy that Caroline was back, to her normal insecure, neurotic, control freak self.

"Bonnie, he's been using me. He knew how I felt about him and he's using it to try and make me feel happy, only to stomp on my heart again, and where does that leave me?" Caroline knew she was reaching with that last one, but she was just so angry.

"Care, please. Open up!" Stefan said from outside the door.

"Go away!" She yelled.

"Caroline, please!" He pleaded.

"Bonnie, I have to go." She said, already packing her belongings into a duffel bag.

"Listen to him, Care. This is Stefan! Not Damon, or Matt, or Tyler, or Klaus. Stefan is so much better then all of them."

"Hey! I apologized for that, and I do regret it." She heard Damon say indignantly in the background.

"You know what I mean, Damon." She said, obviously frustrated.

"Caroline, please open up. I _need_ to talk to you. I want to explain myself, and fix this." He said, his voice raw.

"Bye Bonnie." She hung up before she had her breakdown. "Stefan, please. I don't want to hear it."

"Caroline, that was almost two years ago. I was so hung up on Elena, and I was _so _blind. Care, please!"

"Stefan, don't." She cried.

"Haven't I been through enough?" She whispered quietly to herself. He heard it though, and did what any man would have done.

He broke down the door.

"Care," he said, holding her from behind. She made no move to deny him, but nothing to encourage him either.

"Please. I can't lose you." He said, kissing the back of her head. His thoughts took a different turn, and soon he started kissing her neck and shoulder.

"Caroline, I am not messing with you. Honestly, I'm as scared as you are. I never knew I could understand and relate with someone until I met you. I never felt like this with Elena, and I sure as hell am not using it to bring you back, only to hurt you. You have to believe me." He said, turning her around, and kissed her with everything he had.

"Care?" he asked, looking into her eyes afterwards.

"If you're lying to me, I will flip the switch and break it altogether. I won't come back, I won't ever think of you again." She whispered, her voice threatening to break as she cried.

"I'm not lying. I do care about you, as more than my best friend." He said, with a small smile of relief. He kissed her once more, and this time she responded.

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Sooo? Any thoughts? Thank you to all who have reviewed already, and your kind words :)


	4. Chapter 4

This sooooo late, and long over due I wont even bother making an excuse! Enjoy!

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Vampire Diaries or any of its characters except my own._**

* * *

When she woke the next morning, he was already awake, and had brought them breakfast.

"Good morning." He whispered, as he leaned down to kiss her. A blissful smile graced her face and she brought the sheet up to hide her face shyly.

"Oh no. After last night, there is no more playing shy Care." He said, slipping between the covers and holding her against him.

"Wow, breakfast in bed and a quickie. This is gonna be a great day," She giggled as he nibbled on her neck.

"Well, as much I would love to have that right now, I need to feed my lady." He said as she was climbing out, to slip on her underthings for the day.

"Your lady?" She asked, confused.

"That's one of the things I wanted to talk about this morning. Come back to bed." He said, patting the vacant spot. A bit reluctantly, she crawled back in beside him, and accepted the tray of food.

"How would you feel about making this official? You'll be mine, and I will be yours. Equals, in a relationship?" He asked as she carefully chewed her chocolate croissant.

"_You_," she said, after swallowing, "Want to _date_ me?"

"I want a relationship with you, that exceeds me simply being your best friend. I want to court you, hold you, be there for you, and…" He stopped, because her tears appeared.

"Hey, no crying," he said softly as he wiped them away.

"Stefan, I've never had something like that. Tyler and Matt, sure they were great guys, but they never wanted to be super emotional with me. And Damon, I've forgiven him, but nothing of what happened between us was emotional."

"Which is why, I would be so thrilled if you said yes. Care, I would be the one person that knew you best, and would never hurt you. The physical aspect, as wonderful and earth-shattering as it is," he said, raising his eyebrows suggestively, "Doesn't compare to the wholeness I feel from talking to you, and the joy I experience by simply being around you-"

"Yes." She said interrupting him.

"Really?" He asked hopefully.

"Do I have to show you how serious I am?" She said, reaching behind her to unhook her bra, leaving the straps around her shoulders. His eyes darkened as he moved all the food to somewhere out of the way.

"You said something, about earth shattering?" she smirked, trying to drop the straps.

"Wait!" he exclaimed, remembering something he should have brought up first.

"There is something off putting about a guy saying no to sex." She laughed.

"I have one more thing." He said, pulling out two pieces of paper from under her plate and handing them to her. Her eyes furrowed in confusion, before the light, that could only be called Caroline, returned to her eyes after five months.

"Italy?" She asked, her eyes brimming with tears.

"And Spain, Greece, Dubai, London and Paris." He explained further.

"But… Graduation?" She said, remembering that she was graduating in less than two months.

"Will be the previous day by the time we leave on our trip. Your mom said this was 'a brilliant idea and you deserve to see the world.' And that is a direct quote." He said smiling.

"Now you were about to show me something Miss Forbes." He said with a wink.

* * *

"So, would you like to head to New York now?" Stefan asked, after their afternoon 'drink' in downtown LA.

"Perhaps in a few days. I want to enjoy the beach a little bit more." Caroline said, absentmindedly.

"Something on your mind?" Stefan asked as he entwined their fingers.

"I just keep thinking that I'm dreaming. That we aren't actually on a beach, or that we're together. It's something I dreamt so long for, but I never thought it would actually come true." She said, not really making eye contact with him.

"So, you think that I would never think about you like I do?" He asked, eyebrows furrowing.

"No, well I mean yes! I mean, that everything feels surreal right now. It's like the calm sea before a storm. Something is going to happen and then it's really going to sink in. It feels too peaceful, you know?" She rambled.

"You'd rather we had Klaus breathing down our backs and the return of the gloom and doom?" he asked slightly confused.

"No, definitely no. I just have this feeling. Someone's not going to be happy about us. I just can't place who."

* * *

A/N: Short I know, but I've been doing papers and trying to settle in here at school. It's been a hectic month and a half. Anyways, after I am finished this paper, I will be trying to keep up with my stories. No promises though on frequent updates. Anyways, see you guys when I have a free moment haha


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